one, forever.

so as always,
things happen
which mess with my priorities.

i haven't updated my youtube channel
as much as I hoped nor have i
updated my blog as much as i hoped.

which sucks
i know.

it eats at me everyday while i do other things.
trying to maintain active in social media
is easy but also a struggle at the same time.

i'm not quite sure how to explain it.

my current habitat messes with my priorities.
so many different opportunities and experiences,
i'm greedy.

i want to experience it all.
and i wont settle for one.
just the thought of choosing only one path for my future
terrifies me.

the young me and old me inside me
screaming out for me to make good choices.

how can one just be a realtor for ever?
how can one just be a photographer for ever?
how can one just be journalist for ever?
how can one just be a teacher for ever?
how can one just dog walker for ever?
how can one just be an assistant for ever?
how can one just be a cafe shop owner for ever?
how can one just be a manager for ever?

forever might not be forever, i know.
but anything over 6 months qualifies as forever in my books.

why can't i try everything?
dabble in everything.

i like this and that too.
why do i have to choose just one?
just be one.

why are there only 24 hours in a day,
why must i be in a position from 9-5/6pm with 1hr lunch,
5 working days in a week and 2 days of a weekend?

you're considered one of the lucky ones
if you know what you want to do with your life.
you're certain, positive of that one role
you can be
day in & day out.
you love your job.
your one and only role
your one and only source 
for income.
lucky you.

i want to do this, i want to do that.
can i make money from this and money from that??
i don't need a lot but my bills say i do.

my priorities are already messed up,
nothing will be fixed by the time i wake up.
I'll deal with it tomorrow.

at least for now,
i've updated my blog.




Shout Out To My Ex

Dear exs, dear you. 

Don’t worry.
I don’t love you anymore.
Cos, i mean, c’mon…
that would be creepy.

I still remember the feeling of youth
and how easily i fell for each of you.
Now that I’m older,
just thinking about it makes me…ugh.

Dear boys, dear you.
I fell for you, the boy in a band,
the boy with the guitar and bass.
The boy in the football club,
the boys who never got to 3rd base.

Dear exes, dear you.
You’ve ruined song lyrics and movies,
certain places and diary entries.
We were both there, made some memories.
Even though you were my past, 
you’ve contaminate my history.

Dear boys, dear you.
My optimistic young love was based on 
fantasies and fiction.
Young girls like me forgot about reality 
and all its disheartening contradictions. 
A mirage of Jesse McCartneys in the distance,
but up close, 
you were far from my romantic expectations.

Under optimistic young loves persistence,
I took what I could get and morphed it into existence. 
You said ’I love you’, 
it wasn’t real, 
you hadn’t a clue.
I said it back,
I guess I lied too.

Dear exes, dear you.
You broke my heart,
I might have broken yours a little bit too.
But who were we kidding?
In reality,
our hearts never even cracked,
let alone split in two.

Ah… youth.

Dear boys, dear you,
I met you at school,
I met you through a friend.
I met you online,
Oh the days of MSN.
A few of you I still cherish 
Valuable lessons, here and there
The others I learnt nothing
Yet in a way they made me who i am.

Dear exes, dear you
We’ve lost touch,
that’s just the way things go.
Some of you are even fathers now.
Which, lets be honest,
makes me feel quite old.

16 seems so far away
but I swear to god, 
wasn’t it just yesterday?

Dear boys, dear you.
I really thought you were cute.
I’m sorry I made you believe,
I was worth the pursuit. 
See, there was always something in me
that never felt quite right
18 years it took me
to correct that oversight.

In the most simplest terms, 
that I can convey 
I just didn’t or ever could like boys
in that way.

So to end this,
Dear exes, dear you.
An insignificant spec in your memory,
I may be.
I’d just like to take this chance to say
thank you,

Sincerely me.


英國趣事 / uk stories - 002

You know,

I wish I were a Sim.

So I could choose to have the 
'ambitious' trait.

Then I wouldn't be so
god damn lazy.


趣事; tsui si

英國趣事 / uk 'tsui si' / uk stories
I'd like to start a series of blogs about the fun and interesting stories
that have or may happen during my time here in the, 
soon not to be, 
United Kingdom.

「 The Theif 

This 'tsui si' happened about 5 months ago.
well done Asha for being so goddamn late again.

Carnaby Street, London

I was with Caro and Katherine.
Chilling and having overpriced,
non-authentic Thai food.


We were in the indoor area,
safe from shoppers, their noisy chatter
and their nosey looks at our plates.

So we were chatting away.

Maybe not chatting.
Probably poking at our phones.
Too comfortable in each others company.

Aren't we all?

So at one particular moment,
we all happened to look outside the window.
Observing the other humans having lunch.

there were these 2 girls,
most likely tourists,
sitting right by
the short restaurant barriers.

Those barriers that help keep a 'distance'...
more like,
'encourage' some distance
between patrons and passerby's.

Practically useless barriers.

And at that very moment -
an asshole on a bike sped past.
In one swift movement
snatched up one of their purses.

Everyone witnessed this tragedy take place
in slow motion.

A millisecond after it happened,
some stood up and gasped.
Unsure of whether to help the poor girl,
to reassure the poor girl
to pretend nothing happened/mind their own business
and carry on with their meals.

Others, like us, stared at each other.
Feeling just as useless as those barriers.

I suspect before coming to London town,
she clearly misinterpreted London
as the safest, friendliest city on the planet.

She doesn't anymore.

This event, however,
strengthened my own personal argument
on Hong Kong being the best home city ever.

Back to the story,
Before another millisecond went by,
a man in the crowd sprinted towards the thief.
He didn't come with her,
didn't know her.
He just reacted.
He helped her.

Let me first help you all paint a picture -

Luck be a crowd.

Carnaby Street,
in summer.
Tourists everywhere.
This asshole/thief,
was on a bike.

this criminal mastermind thought
he could quickly manoeuvre through a dense crowd.


Needless to say,
he didn't get too far.
And the nameless hero who went after him,
got the lady's purse back.

As all my UK stories,
I learned something from this.

1. Never leave your personal belongings out in public
2. London is crawling with pickpockets
3. London is filled with civilian heroes
4. Rosa's thai food is overpriced

And that was that.